Let’s talk about all the things your dog thinks they own! It’s probably a big list, isn’t it?
Let’s face it: if your gorgeous furry friend could speak, they’d probably be asking why you’re sitting on their couch. Or maybe why you dare to use their blanket or walk on their floor. That’s because from the moment our pups step paw into our homes, they silently (and smugly) declare ownership over, well… everything.
Even though they might only be 12 pounds of fluff or 90 pounds of muscle, their confidence is unmatched. You may pay the rent, the mortgage, and the food, but guess who really rules the kingdom? That’s right—the four-legged dictator disguised as a cuddle muffin. Well, don’t take it too seriously, because we’re only joking here, but how many times did you deny something for yourself, only to get the best for your canine friend?
So, let’s celebrate this pawsome delusion by taking a hilarious look at the top things your dog thinks they own. Spoiler: boundaries? Never heard of them. Manners? Please. This is full-blown, tail-wagging entitlement. And honestly? Some of us probably wouldn’t have it any other way. Let’s take a look:
1. Your lap
You surely tried your best to give your beloved canine friend the comfort they deserve. You bought the comfiest doggie bed, got the fluffiest blankets so their tails won’t freeze, and placed the arrangement next to you so you’re always close to one another.
But does it really matter? Probably not. One of the first things your dog thinks they own? Your lap. Whether they’re a 6-pound munchkin or a 60-pound big-boned fluff, they see your lap as a designated throne made just for themselves.
Are you going to sit down? Oh, perfect. That’s the universal signal for “come sit on my lap now.” Just forget about holding a laptop or a book on your knees. Your legs are their desk, mattress, pillow, and perch for spying on the world.
The best part? They always manage to block the keyboard, the monitor, or the TV perfectly, so good luck doing your tasks. But hey, looking into those sweet puppy eyes makes everything worth it, doesn’t it?
2. The couch
Another thing your dog thinks they own? Your comfy couch. Well, yes, it totally belonged to you a long time ago, but for them, that’s ancient history. If your furry friend is allowed to sit inside, they probably see the sofa as their throne, napping headquarters, and bird-watch station.
Try moving them over so you can have a sit too, and you’ll get the look—that deeply betrayed expression like you’ve just cancelled the 4th of July. And that’s not all: they sometimes feel so entitled that they will quickly spread out like a furry starfish just to tell you to move further because they can’t stretch their paws.
Here’s the thing: they do what they do and always end up in the prime spot: warm, sunbeam, fluffy and cozy blanket, TV or window view, everything you want when you’re relaxing. Yes, sometimes they can make us feel like visitors in our own homes, can’t they?
3. Your bed
Ah, yes, the pup’s bed. Not the one that you bought for them—the one that you love getting cozy in. But guess what, your pup loves it even more! Whether he’s a smily Bichon or a Great Dane with snoring problems, your pup has no issue claiming your comfy mattress as his personal sleep kingdom.
If you allow them to sleep in your bed, you might notice they’ll spin, kick, sprawl, and slowly but surely end up taking every inch. So, what if you wake up clinging to the edge of the bed like you’re on the Titanic, while Their Royal Pawness peacefully gets their Zzzs in? That’s not a hard scenario to imagine, is it?
And if you try to move them a few inches further? Good luck with that, because they’ll somehow become 100 times heavier. How is that even possible? I still have no idea!
4. Your yard
Step outside and you’ll feel like you’ve entered Dogtopia. This is a magical land where grass beckons, squirrels and birds pose formidable enemies, and every tree serves as a territorial beacon.
Whether it’s acres of space or a postage-stamp lawn, your yard is, without a doubt, one of the things your dog thinks they own. Just take a look at your furry friend: don’t they walk like a fluffy monarch on patrol? Let me know in the comments!
Are there any birds that dare to land? Paw Patrol is on duty. Are there any sticks? Don’t touch them, because they’re a treasure. And if another pup passes by? Get ready for full-blown DEFCON bark to be turned on.
For them, the yard isn’t just a beautiful place to relax and get some fresh air—it’s a playpen, security zone, and throne room all rolled into one. Sometimes, they think of you as the maintenance crew.
…Everything for our furry friends, right?
5. Your friends = their fan club
You’ve probably noticed this, but sometimes, your dog thinks your friends are their fan club. Your furry companion assumes that anyone who enters your home is here for one reason: them. Not to check in on you. Not to spend time together. Not to socialize. Nope—guests are only there to give them belly scratches, admiration, and occasional treats.
If you have a friendly pup, then someone knocking is full-on happiness mode for your furry friend: tricks ready, tail wagging, and potentially wearing their “aren’t-I-cute” face.
And if your friend dares to ignore them, get ready for nose nudges, paw taps, and even full dramatic flops at their feet. That’s right—your favorite people are now honorary pack members. Sharing is caring, right?
6. Your front window
Paw Patrol is back on duty. Or at least that’s what your dog thinks they must do. Sometimes, pups spend more time at the front window than a security guard on a double shift. Whether it’s wind-blown leaves, delivery people, humans passing by, birds flying, or squirrels looking for food, nothing escapes their watchful eye.
They might treat the spot like their lookout tower, their post, or even their soap opera channel. Watch them wag, bark, or even do full-body wiggles when someone comes near. In case they’re bored, sitting in the front window is a perfect activity that brings some easy entertainment.
You might crave peaceful vibes and natural light, but your furry friend wants intel. They’re not just looking outside—they’re guarding the world. The best part? Seeing those smudges shaped like tiny snoots afterward. They might be annoying to clean, but they’re some of the cutest things ever.
7. YOU
You are the ultimate prize for your four-legged companion. Your dog thinks they own your things, your home, and your time, but more than anything? They sometimes believe they own you. And if we’re being honest, they do—wholeheartedly, completely, tail-waggingly.
You’re their favorite human on the planet, their comfort zone, and the person who gets them. Whether they’re following you to the bathroom, napping on your feet, or just staring at you with those soul-melting eyes, they’re claiming you with every woof and wag.
In my case, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love my furry friends. In a dog’s world, you’re not just a perfect pet parent. You’re their everything, and that’s probably the best ownership of all, don’t you think?
Before you go…
Today’s article was just meant to put a smile on your face—and I hope it did! And if you want to return the favor to your furry best friend, here are some toys you can’t go wrong with. Sure, they might already own 76, but hey… can a dog ever have too many toys?
…Until next time, here’s another fun post from The Geeky Gecko you won’t want to miss: 11 Celebrity Dog Breeds Loved by Hollywood
